remember guys: always boob glance with your peripherals.

The difference is in the robe and the beard. They equal confidence.

(on a serious note: I hate the whole “politically correct” movement. It’s not the words that hurt people (because words only mean what we let them), but the meaning people give to and put behind them… and I’m sorry, but if you can’t acknowledge that, you’re a very lame excuse for an “individual.”)

Don’t even try arguing with me about this. Feminists hate lasers.

That’s a fact.

(and yes, I did just make a nerdy penis joke. score!)

Where has the respect gone for capes in todays society!? I mean… come on ladies. You know a cape looks damn good on a sexy young bachelor. Just give in and accept it as true. Cause even if you don’t, it’ll still be true, and you’ll just be wrong. As usual.

…and then shove it in her mouth, hold her nose shut, and cover her mouth. She’ll either swallow or pass out. Either way, you have an unconscious chick on your hands. SCORE!

(In case you are too dim to realize this, its a joke. I don’t condone any version of date rape. Unless the chick is really hot… of course.)

…they all have such judging, bitchy looks when you’re trying to tell them anything serious. Just chillax women. Let us be smooth every once and a while. Please?

I don’t know what it is… but they just never stick around long. At least I’ve got videogames, though.

…if you don’t, you can’t get the optimal feeling/length of guilt.

I admit the question should probably say “where” instead of “how” but its not always about location. For instance, I once got crabs at church. And if that weren’t a complete and utter lie, it would completely prove my point.

But I bet someone has… so there.

Why can’t words just mean what they mean? Because girls won’t let them, that’s why!!!